Nov 21 2008
I’m a cougar?
The song comes to mind..” I was country, when country wasn’t cool”. I married a man, 14 years ago, who was 14 years my junior. We met at a haunted house attraction; he was standing on a pile of sandbags , fists on his hips, surveying his kingdom. I took one look and smiled. My son, who is only 6 years younger than my husband, walked up to me laughing and asked if I was admiring the ” spiderman”…. I said ” yes, thats the man I’m going to marry.” My son laughed, but in June, he walked me down the aisle to hand me over to my new life. I didn’t look at age; I only looked at him .
We have had a life of ups and downs, as all marriages have; some problems might have been age related, but most, I think, are just the same kind of troubles most marriages have. We’ve fought over finances, girls chasing him…( he is an minor celebrity in our area, being a horror actor ) We’ve fought over the amount of time he’s spent playing games on computers.
But let me tell you what we don’t fight over….. a ferret escaping her cage and waking us up with a tiny cold nose stuck in an ear; being woke up at 4 am to take a hurt cat I found on the way to work to an emergency vet clinic; TV shows, current events, hiking, caving, fishing ….. Once, when times were really bad, I told a friend, ” if he did anything really bad, I’d be done…but he don’t drink, do drugs, skip work, beat me, insult me…he comes home and hands me his entire pay without complaint…. ” Times were bad, but not as bad as some have it. We stuck together and worked on our problems, didn’t avoid them , didn’t ignore them; we worked on our marriage together, and today we have a good one.
And now I hear I’m a cougar. I can’t help but laugh as I hear that term. What I really am is just a lucky wife. When cute college girls come to greet him and get their picture with him, I step aside and let him have his space; once the photo is taken, he gently sets the little cutie aside and reaches for my hand. He will continue to speak to them, but he makes it clear I am the only one that stands with him in life. After 14 years of marriage, we are not only husband and wife, we are best friends. We are still together because we LIKE each other. We like to be with each other.
When I had a stroke last year, he stayed at my side day and night, falling asleep at my bedside holding my hand. When he brought me home from the hospital he helped me lovingly with all the new issues I faced. As I stood at the head of the stairs waiting for him to join me , I realized I was truly trapped on my second floor without his aid. I needed him now in a way I hadn’t needed him before, and he didn’t let me down. Now I’m mostly recovered and we still have fun, but he watches me with a new look in his eyes. He knows how close he came to losing me. I know how much I still want to be with him.
I’m a cougar and he’s my boy toy…. * just dies laughing * …. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
